Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Mother's Day Disaster

I loved watching and reading about everyone else's fabulous mother's day. Mine was FAR from perfect.

For starter's, I'm not a fan of mother's day. Another one of those corny holidays, where you're required to tell people how you feel about them even though the sentiments feels forced. Yup, Debbie Downer here, at your service! My own mother and I have a far from perfect relationship, I'm not close with either of my grandma's, and Rocky has his own issues with his mommy dearest - needless to say, positive maternal relationships are not my forte.

I didn't put a lot of expectation into Rocky doing anything for mother's day. We don't really have the money for silly spending (though a new set of Tupperware would of been greatly appreciated and useful), and Rocky's not one for making crafts. In fact, Saturday night I needed to finish some last minute grocery shopping. Rocky opted to join us, and tried to make an escape in the grocery store for the in-store florist.

Sunday morning arrived. I set my alarm clock for 6am so we could make it on time for 8am church service. I got up, took a shower, got both the kids up, fed the kids pancakes, got both the kids dressed, and then drove all four of us to church. Rocky was crabby.

We had gotten into a fight Saturday night because of his crabiness, and I knew Sunday wasn't going to be any better.

We got home from church. While Houston napped, Rocky volunteered to make brunch (brunch is 10am in our house), which was great, but I cleaned the whole damn kitchen after that.  I was slaving away in the kitchen cleaning grease from every little crevice, and Rocky was busying himself on the computer shopping on CL for RC cars. My internal thermostat was beginning to register rising heat.

Rocky continued to sit on the computer while I finished folding 2 loads of laundry, picking up tidbits around the house, changing sheets on both kid's beds (gotta love leaky diapers and leaky 2 year olds on the same night). All of this while Houston napped, a very LONG nap. We had planned to go to the Legoland Sea Life Aquarium after H's nap, but he didn't wake up till almost noon, the aquarium was an hour's drive, and Georgia needs a nap no later than 3, so I knew time was limited and it wasn't ideal to go (I like toddler's on schedules = less temper tantrums).

Rocky moved from the computer to the bed, where he proceeded to take a nap while I made lunch. That internal thermostat was really beginning to rise. Somewhere in his hour long nap my thermostat reached boiling, and I let the beast unleash. I accused him of being lazy, and unappreciative. All I wanted for mother's day was to sit on my ass and do NOTHING. Was it possible to not change a single diaper today?

We spent the rest of the afternoon not talking to each other. Rocky went outside to do yard work, and I took the kids to go buy dog food. I even tried spoiling Georgia with a toy, but she was pretty upset Daddy wasn't joining us (knowing he was at home without her was really upsetting). She threw a fit in Wal-Mart, and some man laughed and chuckled and said, "Nice mother's day, huh?" If only he knew.

Home from the store, Georgia sees Daddy is still in the yard. She knows it's nap time. I know it's nap time. Daddy is on his own schedule and invites her outside, which I oppose, resulting in another crying fit from Georgia (we all know what happens when she doesn't have a nap!). Georgia wins. Outside she goes. I start prepping dinner.

Sometime later, Georgia has to go to the bathroom, and I'm able to convince her to lay down with the promise of chips in bed. By 6pm, Rocky is still outside ****** around. I begin to feed the kids, he joins us, and then I clean up dinner.

That was my mother's day in a nutshell.

Now, I could allow you to think my husband is horrible. But he's not. There have been worse mother's days (and Christmas's, Valentine's Days, etc), in which Rocky was blatantly drunk or hung over. Hahaha, I'm really proving my point that he's not horrible now!

Here's the thing, I don't need mother's day to define my relationship with my husband. Sure, it wasn't fun logging onto facebook and seeing everyone else's fab posts, knowing my husband was doing absolutely NOTHING. But I don't need other people's relationships to define my relationship either. Rocky is a constant work in progress (have you ever stopped and really understood that statement, "work in progress."), but aren't we all?

He did make up for it by coming home Monday with FOUR pairs of size 11 shoes. Which in my book, is like coming home with the winning lottery ticket and saying we can retire before the age of 30. He did take me out to dinner - and internally I grimaced the entire time knowing how much this was costing us financially (mind you - we did only spend $25 on dinner). Being married isn't about perfection (or money), the perfect mother's day, or getting expected gifts. It's about knowing when to put your tail inbetween your legs, trying to be a team, and finding a reason to laugh when you least want to.
Apology granted, Rocky.

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1 comment:

  1. my hubby remembered Mothers Day on Sunday morning. He made a fab breakfast and stopped bitching about the expensive baby wearing thinger I'd bought myself the day before. (although that was like 80% because he tried it out that morning and love love loved it.) I wasn't the least bit perturbed, over the last nearly-five-years I've learned that my husband sucks ass at remembering mothers day, my birthday (he was so busy hunting he forgot my birthday last year, when I was 9 months pregnant I WAS SUPER HAPPY.) etc etc etc but he is awesome for spoiling me. If I really really want something, he makes it happen as a 'for no reason' kind of thing. So I don't fault him for sucking at those official events. (although a card would be nice!)