Tuesday, January 15, 2013

"Haters Gunna Hate"

I have a groupie. Don't know who it is.

Someone I have offended somewhere in the course of my life.

They keep commenting on my SSAW posts. I don't know why?

Part of me wonders, if this follower hates me so much, why continue to follow me? Why engross themselves in continually hating me? Isn't it exhausting? To take the time and effort to read my posts, to visit my website, to see when I've updated, to write and leave comments anonymously. It takes time. I must have really pissed them off. And then I'm grateful that my own hatred has matured past this point. There was a time I hated my sister so much I stalked her facebook and personal website.

Another part of me wonders if it's just a random internet troll. They exist. I like the idea of a troll, like the one that lives under the bridge in Dora the Explorer. Fat, ugly, and dumb.
A third part of me, honestly feels bad. What did I do to this person to make them so angry? Is this something I have done recently? Is this something I did several years ago? I have tried to work on myself: be more compassionate, not be involved in drama, find a purpose, lead by example....

So for now, I have turned off anonymous commenting on my personal blog. And it makes me slightly stabby. I have put myself out there, like a wide open book, so that people who go through similar experiences can find a soft place to rest their thoughts - to be personally available, so when that moment in life arises where you need to vent your frustrations, or commiserate with company - I'm here. And you don't have to jump through hoops to get to me.

So, to my fan, I love you. I love you for making me re-evaluate myself. I love that at some point in my life, I was so outspoken that I had the ability to move you - though it did not sway you in my direction. I love this game we play, and yes, I love that you are a coward, and can't put on your big girl panties.
Sorry, it had to be said.

Hugs and Kisses Sugar Pie Honey Dumpling,

XO Jake

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