Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Why This Mommy Needs An Aspirin

My day started at 1:45a. Okay, a slight exaggeration, but I had this horrible dream about an otter with these enormous beaver-like teeth chasing me - one of those dreams that I couldn't out run, out climb, or out whit the otter. Eventually, I had climbed onto a tall box, and the otter was jumping as high as possible to get me.  I knew I had to let him sink his huge beaver teeth into the bone of my forearm so that I could catch him and break his jaw in half. My dreams tend to be a little nutty, which I attribute to my irregular sleep patterns brought on by having multiple children. But this dream was a metaphor for my day, and I'll reference back to it later and you'll see the connection.

I managed to go back to sleep after that dream. As Rocky's alarm clock started going off at 4am, Houston started stirring. By 4:30a, Rocky kissed me good-bye, and Houston really started revving up in the monitor. I think his teeth are bothering him. With a little magic, I get him re-settled. I go check on Georgia and discover she's wet the bed. After cleaning up that mess, it's now 5am. I WILL get 1 more hour of sleep. I'm determined. The kids were gracious, and let me sleep till 7am.

I have six loads of laundry to do today: whites, colors, Rocky's work clothes, towels, G's wet bed, and cloth diapers. I was blessed this morning with dealing with the San Diego County Court System - in particular, the El Cajon Branch, which is made even more difficult by the fact that EC has random, unlisted hours of operation.

I put the kids down for a late nap at 3p, and attempted a hurricane clean-up. I was derailed when I went to scoop the cat box and learned the cat has worms - which if you knew me intimately, you know I'm wormaphobic - stand-on-the-chair-and -scream-type wormaphobic, do the heebie-jeebie-dance-type-wormaphobic. Gross. Looks like Rocky will be making a stop at Petco for some dewormer. Why isn't the cat's Advantage working? I just gave it to him 2 weeks ago. Hmmm.

Houston's teeth must really be bothering him, because he is up by 4p, only a 1 hour nap. He has been insistent the last 2 weeks that I either hold him, or sit on the floor with him. He's also in that transitional stage of frustration - happens to all babies before they accomplish a milestone; rolling over, crawling, pulling up, walking, talking, etc. Rocky comes home at 4:30p, and Houston is following me around the house just yelling and crying at me. Sometimes if I ignore him, he gives up and goes plays, but not today.

This is where the day felt hectic.

The cat needs to be dewormed, Houston is wailing, dinner needs to be made, and Georgia (now awake) is so demanding for Rocky's attention. I'm holding Houston and browning ground beef, and Rocky is trying to turn on Netflix (we have no cable) for Georgia - but Netflix won't connect. I settle Houston down on the floor with some kitchen utensils, but he gets bored and goes looking for his sister. Rocky is still fussing with Netflix when I notice it's QUIET. There is trouble to be found.

The door to the garage is open, and Houston has managed to climb down the garage step with his sister. They are playing in the cats wet food bowl mixed with the dewormer medicine, and the cats water bowl.  Uck! Don't they know he has worms?!  Washing hands and faces at the kitchen sink, we notice a growing puddle at our feet. We open up the cupboard and there is a puddle of water under the sink. And of course, Houston wants to play in the cupboard we are looking in. We throw him into his crib to get him out of the way, he starts wailing. Rocky finds the leak, something instantly fixable, but everything under the sink is soaked, and we are still trying to cook dinner among the items now drying on the counter.

Houston, now out, and temporarily calmed, is wailing again for attention. His hands are stretched to they sky hoping someone will pick him up. I know it seems mean, but I can't carry him all day long, and he doesn't particularly love being worn in a carrier. I hand him a new toy - a pot lid. I've been avoiding these. Houston is a boy by nature, and loves pushing things along the floor. The pot lid SCREECHING ALONG THE TILE FLOOR IS SO LOUD. ROCKY AND I HAVE TO YELL AT EACH OTHER. "DO YOU WANT YOUR TORTILLAS FRIED?!" "REFRIED OR BLACK BEANS?!" Georgia steals Houston's pot lid, because that's what big sisters do, and Houston begins to whine and wail. This is when I reference back to my dream about the otter with the beaver-like teeth. I know I have to let the otter sink his teeth in my arm so that I can grab him and kill him. Just like I know I have to OFFER UP A SECOND POT LID. THE NOISE MAY BE INAUDIBLE AND DEAFENING, BUT I AM WINNING! HOUSTON IS NOT CRYING, GEORGIA IS PLAYING NICELY, AND WE ARE FINISHING UP MAKING DINNER. ROCKY SAYS, "MAYBE THIS WILL MAKE YOU NOT WANT TO HAVE MORE CHILDREN?"

We sit down to dinner, and without fail, 5 minutes into dinner, Georgia turns to Daddy and says, "Take me poop Dad." Every night, even if we take her before dinner, she has to go during dinner. After dinner is bath time. I let Rocky sit with the kids while I clean up dinner, make his lunch, coffee for tomorrow, pick up toys, continue on with my laundry detail, feed dogs, story time, bed time....it's endless.

There is no alcohol or drugs in this house to numb my brain. I'm in between books. What's the next best thing? We turn to the most mind numbing show on the planet, Trailer Park Boys. It is guaranteed you will become stupider after watching it. You might even drool.

I am no saint at motherhood. And I know many a mother deals with far more. I commend and honor the military moms that do it all by themselves while their husbands are on deployment. I feel blessed to have 2 healthy children driving me nuts, and I know this time in our lives will be so short, and so dearly missed when they are grown. Even when I read this blog post now, it doesn't sound nearly as hectic as it felt. For now though, this mommy needs an aspirin! STAT!

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  1. Holy Moly Jess (I mean Jake LOL!) Way to go! I had NO IDEA you had taken this and started running with it, AMAZING! Your blog is gorgeous too- how'd you manage that so fast?
    Congrats and enjoy the journey my friend!
    ps your day WAS hectic! Worms = BEYOND gross!!!

  2. Lmao! Gavin ALWAYS has to pooh in the middle of dinner too! Idk what it is...but never fails.

  3. lol, thanks Miranda! I decided to just KISS, and not worry about making a business out of this, and just have fun with it. I made the blog with shabbyblogs.com - it was really easy (and they have tutorials!).

    @Danielle: what's with pooping @ dinner? nervous stomach's? making room?